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THE PERFECT CHERRY MARTINI
That's right. I said PERFECT and don't argue with me!
Ingredients: Three Olives Cherry Vodka, PAMA Pomegranate Liqueur, Brut Champagne, Fresh Cherries
Yes, I was the one who would unwrap all your Lifesavers to get the red one. I only want cherry popsicles and I love cherry soda. Cherry pie is my favorite pie, cherry Danish is my preference for breakfast pastries and I even tried a cherry flavored cigar once!
So, you can understand my quest for the perfect Cherry Martini.
In my crusade to find the best cherry martini, I have ordered so-called cherry martinis in bars from San Francisco to New York and I have always been disappointed. Most of them used cherry brandy, some of them used cherry syrup, a few got close but no cherry flavored bubble gum cigar!
After some of the abominations I was subjected to (think cherry cough syrup that you get charged $18 for) I set out to create my own cherry martini. After months of experiments and quite a few bottles of sludge that was being passed off as cherry vodka, Three Olives came out with their cherry vodka and I knew I was on the home stretch!
With their lovely cherry infused vodka and a few little touches of my own to deepen the character and add depth to the flavor profile, I finally perfected the cherry martini - thus my addition of "perfect" at the beginning of the name!
You cannot change one ingredient and you cannot adjust the ratios. Don't try or you'll end up with a cherry martini that is not as perfect - trust me, I know what I'm talking about!
BEWARE!
The Perfect Cherry Martini is a powerful potion! Here's what happened to me one night after a few Perfect Cherry Martinis.
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If you like this martini you might also like my:
Chocolate Cherry Cordial Martini
Chocolate Covered Cherry Martini
Cherry Lemon Drop Martini
Cherry Pie Martini
Cherry Pomegranate Valen-tini
Missing Cherry Martini
Or My FRUIT MARTINIS
Tramp, Trollop, Strumpet, Floozy, Tart, Jezebel, Hussy, Harlot, Wench, Chippie, Vamp!
THE CONFESSIONS OF A PAST LIFE MADAM
A friend and I were enjoying some of my Perfect Cherry Martinis one day when we got off on the subject of "women of ill repute". Don't ask me how the conversation got around to that subject, we were, after all, well into our third martini at the time.
We were attempting to come up with all the vintage words for "shady ladies" and ended up with this list:
Tramp, Trollop, Strumpet, Floozy, Tart, Jezebel, Hussy, Harlot, Wench, Chippie, Vamp, and Concubine as well as the terms of "soiled dove", "woman of ill repute", "fallen woman" and "shady ladies".
We were giggling and pointing at each other as we called them out. It was totally goofy and totally fun and we were laughing like a couple of mad women at the archaic terms. I suppose we would not place ourselves in any of those categories and, therefore, it was hilarious to fling them at each other.
Afterwards I got to thinking (yes, I know, thinking always gets me into trouble), but I thought, I like those words. They carry a kind of romance that is absent in our current vernacular, they have a touch of understanding and humor - maybe because of the eras they come from.
In times past there were only so many jobs a woman could take if she had no husband, family or community to support her. Her choices were pretty much limited to being a teacher, a cook, a seamstress, running a boarding house, taking in laundry or becoming a "fallen woman". If you had no education or money most of those jobs were out of your reach. If you didn't want to starve there was often only one choice. (Read "Soiled Dove Plea"). In today's world we are not so limited, but it is only recent history where that change has occurred.
Had I been born 100 or so years earlier my life would have been a whole different story! If I had the kind of temperament I have in this century I doubt, very sincerely, if I would have become a farmer's wife, a seamstress or a teacher. I cannot see myself plowing a field, I hate to sew and a school room full of kids is not my idea of a great job. Plus, my personality does not lend itself to being good wife material!
I am convinced I would have eventually become a Madam in some Honky Tonk in one of the "big cities". I like business, I'm pretty sociable, I like to have a drink now and then, I like flashy clothes, I like to paint my face and I like gambling towns. That pretty much points to career in a past life as the proprietor of a house of ill repute. Of course, being the control freak that I am I would have to be the Madam. I am not one to "work in the field", I'm better at giving orders and letting others do the menial tasks!
Picture me in a lavender satin dress, petticoats so large I knock the whiskey glasses off the tables, lots of ostrich feathers, a good amount of rouge (that's blush to you young 'uns out thar!), my hair dyed an electric shade of pinkish red, big bosoms proudly heaving in my decolletage, enjoying a "snort" while my "girls" earn their keep upstairs adding more silver dollars to my coffers!
Madam Diva welcomes you to her establishment, The Fabulous Fallen Females of Fable Falls are here to entertain you! Put yer pistols behind the bar, grab yer girl and commence to pokin!
You'll have to put your dollar on the dresser, Dearie, before they drop their drawers!
